First, a quick progress update: According to the gym’s scale, I lost 5 lbs. !!Excitement!! Then, when C left town for new job orientation in Milwaukee, I suddenly became a slacker and stopped going to the gym. ...Downer...
Then Valentine’s Day happened and let’s just sum that up by noting the ensuing chocolate orgy wasn’t a pretty thing to witness.
However, yesterday I finally had a come-to-Jesus meeting with myself, got back on track, mostly (I mean, I do still have mass quantities of Valentine’s Day chocolate to polish off and my birthday is next week). And I slunk back into the gym, tail between my legs. I must also note: While I supremely hate every nanosecond of working out, I do like how I feel after. I'll make this important mental note in my head each time I do something physical because I’m still great at finding excuses not to be physical.
My goals until next time:
1-register for the Run for Water 5K.
2-On March 13, there is a Cougar Run 5K in Dawsonville, GA for Relay for Life. A friend of friends just died yesterday after years of fighting breast cancer (leaving two small children behind--I am heartsick about this), and while I'm not ready to run on 3/13, I do have a goal of walking this 5K in her honor.
2-Keep visiting the gym.
3-Make less excuses.
4-Finish inhaling all this Valentine’s Day chocolate.
Now, onto this round’s project: I have made………….my cooking show.
Please know, what you’re about to witness is precisely what happens when you don’t have producers, you lack a general plan, have no real vision for what it is you’re attempting to accomplish, a large working/cooking area is non-existent, you don’t have a qualified wardrobe stylist, your sous chef is a diva, and you decide to be your own cameraman. Friends don’t let friends film themselves.
Before you view, some disclaimers and warnings:
1-The lighting/sound/angles/focus are horrifically bad, and my camera freezes to refocus whenever there are big or fast movements. Apparently, I’m a big (and very fast) mover. A lot.
2a- I’m really nervous throughout, and when I get nervous, I tend to babble to fill up silences. I’m not good with silences. I did, however, find an editing tool and was able to edit the vast majority of this babble out. THAT was a relief.
2b-Seriously: I took out 35 minutes of pure babble footage.
3-Wardrobe issues: The sous chef removed her shirt and I didn’t have time to argue about it, fearing the chicken would burn. Also, you’ll see my cleavage nearly 800 times in this video, and I apologize. I’ll write a complaint letter to Mossimo for Target on behalf of all whose eyes were exposed to this.
4-I had to bend down whenever I felt the need for my face to be in the shot. Because if I kept adjusting the camera, the focus-y thing-y would have gone haywire and you’d totally end up with migraines trying to watch this.
5a-This video is 21 minutes, 21 seconds (too long). The sound quality is bad. There was no script. The sous chef has a semi-temper tantrum once, attempts to grab dangerous knives, and insists on doing a magic spoon trick at one point. In addition, there are multiple examples of poor parenting techniques in addition to poor cooking ones. Last, my kitchen is messy. And, at the end, I’m off key in the song.
5b- Which is why I totally understand if you want to fast forward through a lot and/or just don’t have that kind of time.
6-If I had to give this cooking show a name, I’d call it: “One Big, Hot Mess with the Babbling Chef and an Unstable Assistant.”
7-On the up side: zero commercial breaks.
I made Giada de Laurentiis’ Chicken Picatta (with spaghetti). Here’s a link in case you’d like to make this on your own (minus a shirtless assistant and incoherent adult babbling in the background): Go HERE.